Sunday, October 5, 2008

The Breakfast

It was the mailman’s last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood. When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift envelope.
At the second house they presented him with a box of fine cigars.
The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures.
At the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee. She took him by the hand, gently led him through the door, and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced.
When he had enough they went downstairs, where she fixed him a giant breakfast, eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and fresh squeezed orange juice. When he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee.
As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup’s buttom edge. “All this was just too wonderful for words,” he said, “but what’s the dollar for?”
“Well,” she said, “last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day, and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you. He said, ‘Fuck him, give him a dollar.” The lady then said, “And the breakfast was my idea!”


The engagement had been announced by the families of the couple the night before. So Sally proudly wore the engagement ring to office and displayed it before her friends. Gesticulating with her hand to attract attention, no one seemed to notice it, to her dismay.
Before noon, as the girls were powdering their faces for lunch break, Sally exclaimed audibly: “My goodness, it’s hot in here. I’ll have to take this ring off!”


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